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The Hair on yr Head

by David F. Bello

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1.
My Own Hole 02:33
with the people who are still around you youll adapt easily trust me trust me trust me trust me i felt that way before i felt that way last year i felt that way when they were going its the little things itll still be weird youll find out its just becoming better i really did dig my own hole but i can see the top and im climbing out im climbing out
2.
Shoulder 06:29
put your soft head on my shoulder ive got to keep my eyes on the road, im numb and youre all that i can feel and youre all that i can feel the wheels softly touch the shoulder ive got both of my hands around you its worth neglecting the wheel its worth neglecting the wheel i dont ever wanna leave my seatbelts will hold forever trapped in glass my seatbelts will hold any time now i can expect that well drive right off the street and into a tree-top and into a tree-top let me stay here forever i dont need the jaws of life to saw my feet off to saw my feet off
3.
180 03:36
if the world is burning down thats fine, thats fine if yr calling to cancel our plans thats fine, thats fine neighbors are cool dont talk to my parents the nautilus shell neighbors are cool if they dont talk to my parents helictopters swarm thats fine
4.
i think i laughed harder than i ever thought could be sincere when i found she didnt know that you had a lab of yr own in the basement behind dark silver doors attached by cords to the computer upstairs to control key pairs the symptoms of being awake leave no teeth buried in the cave in my face so the lion wont tear you apart ill pay you enough to buy a new heart in a new place when yr father was shot right in front of yr best friends house i think i cried when you dropped me off at the telephone lines i think i finally forgot abt 1999 and the good luck dark red wine poured in the shower drain and wasting such a great looking stain and if we change our minds at just the right moments, we can reenact what evolution set down in our lowest ribs! the only difference lies in missing bone!
5.
the only thing keeping my head from exploding after being shot with this gun that im loading is the music that fills both my ears to their limits and the sounds that complie the tune into its polyrhythmic polymelodic sporadic and episodic moments of beauty that make life worth those awful moments that truly truly hurt its not convincing enough i think ill take the easy way out i hope that the future is nothing like right now my fingers are blistering and my nails curl down over my fingertips to tap on my eyelids waking me up in the morning like aphids on tomatoes and lettuce that grow in yr garden where i steal all the fruit before surfaces harden and make it impossible to break with my weak teeth without losing them all before biting what i want to eat its too hard to do the things i need to pull off soon before i lose energy and fall crashing into the roofs of the homes of the grown-ups and families that interact without love all of them adults whom i knew as children when their hair was so dirty and faces so willing would walk up to vans where candy was offered and never be seen after promises honored goodbye small babies, abortion survivors! they live only to grow up to be liars who steal from my house in the night and tell me that they are my only escape from the world that burns slowly and turns on its border like tops that never stop. even after the guns poke their foreheads into bedroom windows and peek around smiling at potential widows to witness the writhing that follows rejoicing at parties where drinking brings all outside noise in results in authorities breaking in bedrooms to take husbands outside to be shot under the moon line up all the wives in the night and tell me who they are so i can call out to them as their families are burned in public in the field! in the night! stretching to day
6.
Month 02:28
(instrumental)
7.
Six Months 00:47
(instrumental)
8.
can you tell im just talking to make you laugh and that im living from one sentence to the next are you happy with how this is going because im drowning in yr mystery whoever owns the names you use to speak to friends i cant earn or lose obviously knows a thing i know abt how to go abt speaking to you inside jokes are nothing at all except little tricks from up within my sleeves its easier than giving you a call because i dont have to plan a message to leave confide in me yr secrets so deep that they burrow out from underneath their little legs are as sharp as knives and theyre practiced in the art of taking lives i lie when i say: policemen they know more than me and firefighters know less i say arson isnt a felony and there is no pain in my chest hopefully i can make it the truth when i tell you this is the last song ill stop avoiding any mention of you and ill keep my metaphors true upon deciding to give up on all dreams i see ive ruined em all on my own if i ever sleep ill be dead if only i could truly alone if there was another soul to give me hope id be able to forget there was another way id be a machine with barely a single use so keep quiet if you dont know what to say if you tell a soul how ive made up my mind to be rid of good, evil, and in between youll have ruined my secret and damaged my find just keep making a scene! ive got no way to tell what i need to get out innocent, unhurt, and unmarried no eyes, no ears, no mind, no fears make up my mind for me is it still a crime if there is no victim except for the perpetrator i say we all have the right to hurt ourselves even if the risk of dying is greater she cant come back to me sunce she never was that close i miss the smile that closed her eyes and the subtle way she wore her clothes surprisingly i thought there may be hope another surprise, i took a chance of asking the questions i never got out and ill rarely if ever use again you pop yr head in for a quick hello but im busy or at least pretending so can you tell theres a look in my eyes that you can never know blue and grey and red and white walking through town on a spring night caffeine bubbles in my veins theres a desire to fall from this height her arms wrap around me when i fantasize we live happy near blank homes we dont have children but in the future we might get a dog and feed him our bones our skeletons will rest on mt. olivet and at night our ghosts can walk free to the school where we met and stroll by the library before we expire we can both retire move away from the monument to florida or paris or canada or wherever judas was sent i can see evidence of a possibility that chances are never was real shes just a trick of fate a spin on a tired wheel how did i miss a glance so quick that it barely existed at all ever since then ive been feeling sick and im just so sick of it all
9.
im already in the seventh grade and im the only kid who hasnt gotten laid tonight, im lonely because the girl i like doesnt like me tonight, theres a dance in the gym with a d.j. playing songs the kids suggested to him the boys have taken off their ties and the girls arent wearing any shoes its time to send all the children home to wait outside where a few boys have alcohol and cigarettes that they dont know how to inhale but its best because theyre so old theyre gotten stale the backseat of yr brothers car groping and hopeing to go all the way with one hand touching her chest and the other inside her dress the way in the morning the winter air smells the smile on yr face that tells "how good life can be! how so few of us can be happy!"
10.
do i care enough to write a song abt fucking you or not fucking tonight i dont remember putting yr name in my phone but i remember, i remember the numbers you typed fuck anyone who said a bad word abt me and my friends today i think theyre just trying to look like they fit in to whatever bar theyve snuck and fuck them for writing on my hand and fuck fuck fuck my overuse of the word "fuck" and if i win in the end (ill call you) and if i break into this land (ill plant you) and if you let me take yr leaves (ill grow you) and if you sleep around my hand (ill keep you) take the accent off the vowel and put it between yr lips (cracked) like a seedshell (cracked) the liberty bell (cracked) it seems the last 40 minutes were spent leading up to this i put my hand into the mess you call the hair on yr head!
11.
you hold me down you hold me tight you let me go you know ill stay maybe ill swim, maybe i wont maybe ill drown, maybe ill float maybe ill leave, maybe ill stay maybe ill abandon you someday maybe ill do it, as bad as it could be maybe youll forgive whatever is wrong with me
12.
My Own Hole 02:53
with the people who are still around you youll adapt easily trust me trust me trust me trust me i felt that way before i felt that way last year i felt that way when they were going its the little things itll still be weird youll end up just becoming better i really did dig my own hole but i can see the top and im climbing out im climbing out

credits

released January 1, 2006

Everything by David F. Bello, except where noted.

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David F. Bello Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

I sing for The World is a Beautiful Place & I Am No Longer Afraid to Die. This is my solo project.

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